Run on

I've been looking for a hobby, and I think I've found one. It's running. I started the Couch-to-5K Running Plan last week. I'm stuck on the first stage still, but I noticed yesterday that I got a little farther before my shins started killing me.

I got some great advice from a man at my church, Dave, who has run more than 130 marathons. He's 68 years old and runs no less than 10 miles every morning. I talked to him on Sunday, and he had run 22 miles on Saturday and 11 miles before church. He told me not to just run on the treadmill. He drew me a map to a local trail that he recommends, then decided he'd just show me. So, we met at his house after church and walked the trail. That was so nice of him! I plan to go there tomorrow morning as I have the day off. He also told me to run some everyday, not 3 days a week like the plan says. I noticed this week that I'm not as sore even though I've been running everyday. I'm going to try to run a complete first stage session tomorrow, then move on to stage two.

My goal is to run the State Fair 5K on Sept. 30. I told Dave I just want to finish without being last. He told me not even to worry about being last -- who cares? He said there's nothing wrong with walking some during the race; that's not against the rules. But he also added, "That's what I do when I run a 50-mile race. I run for an hour, then walk a little bit." Gee, thanks Dave!

Watch this show

I'm on day 2 of TV-free redux since I wasn't exactly successful last time. But I'm fantasizing about the shows I'm missing.

Here's one I wholeheartedly recommend: Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon Ramsay comes across as an evil asshole on his American show. On this BBC America show, he's firm, a little rude, and he curses like a sailor, but it's clear that he cares about the restaurateurs with whom he works. He wants them to be successful, and sometimes that requires a swift kick in the pants.

So, if you're not trying to kick the TV habit, this is one to watch!

Baskets of eggs

I really, really like Etch. (If you've read this blog in the last two months you already know that.) But we're not exclusive yet, so I'm determined not to keep all my eggs in one basket, so to speak. I've already written how I'm so scared of liking him this much. I figure if I continue to see other people, it won't be so devastating if things don't work out. All of my eggs won't get broken at once.

Enter Officer Do-Right. I met him at Starbucks on Friday afternoon. He came in with his daughter. I made a mental note of his attractiveness, but figured he was married. As I was leaving he pulled his car next to mine and asked if he could talk to me. Turns out he's unattached. We went out Friday night, Sunday afternoon, and Sunday night. He's very intelligent. We had some good, deep conversations, though sometimes I had to tell him to lighten up a little. His kisses were good, though I had to ask him to dry them up some.

He's asked me three times to join him and his daughter for dinner at his place. I have declined. Tonight I told him that I'm not comfortable being around his daughter. He was very quiet. I asked if that bothers him and he said it does. He ended the call quickly after that. I'm not sure what will happen now. The ball is in his court. I had to be honest, though. His daughter's at the age that is my least favorite, and I think it's way too early to meet her regardless.

I've enjoyed spending time with him, and I'd like to see more of him if he can get past my reluctance to date his daughter. If he can't, then I may have to find another spare basket.

TV-free

This is going to be a TV-free weekend. I've got to finish The Year of Magical Thinking for Monday night's book club. I just started it last night. If I keep the TV off, I know I can finish it.

You know, I don't really have any "must-see, can't miss" shows. Most of the time, I'm just channel surfing and letting my brain turn to mush. And I'm paying $50 a month for the privilege! Doesn't make sense, I know. But, there are some shows I enjoy, and everyone's brain needs a rest now and then, right?

So, here I go. I'm turning it off right now. No, really. Yes, that is an episode of The Wayans Bros. that I've never seen. Too bad. I'm turning it off anyway. Okay, pick up the remote. Do it. Go ahead. *Click*

Gee, it's quiet in here.

Past the point of no return

I had a five hour phone conversation with Etch last night. It was mostly good, but there was a long discussion of his last relationship which was a little uncomfortable. I'm scared because it ended pretty recently. I don't want to be the rebound girl. I like him so much. I don't want to get hurt.

I woke up terrified this morning. I realized that I have thrown away a lot of guys recently. I was always looking for the first screw up so I could dump them fast. Some of them didn't even make it to the first date. I realized Etch has snuck up on me, and I'm past that "throwing away" point. I'm scared about his last relationship, but there's nothing I can, or want to, do about it. On one hand, I don't want to overlook something important, but on the other hand, I think I'm enjoying spending time with him so much that I won't regret it if things do eventually go wrong. I would be disappointed of course, but I don't think I'll feel like I made a mistake in continuing to see him.

I'm just so afraid of the feelings I have for him. They are scary, yet exciting. It has been a very long time since I've felt this way about someone -- like if he were to do something that upset me, I wouldn't just stop taking his phone calls; we'd actually talk about it and try to work things out. That's a scary thought. He actually means something to me now. It was clear in early parts of the conversation last night that he likes me a lot too. He's told me a couple of times that he adores me. The number of times he calls me has increased considerably.

It's going to be okay. I'm having a great time with him. Even the things that scare me add to the excitement. And I honestly wouldn't change a thing.

Still getting a shirt

I don't know why this popped into my head, but here's a funny story.

When I was in high school, I met a guy in a grocery store and gave him my phone number. We talked on the phone a couple of times, and I was starting to like him. He was a few years older than I was and already out of high school. I knew my parents would never let me date him. One evening he called and said he wanted to see me. I was nervous about what my parents would say, so I decided to let him come over, but just not give them any advance warning. That way they couldn't say no.

So, the guy told me he had been working on his car, so he was going to put on a clean shirt then come over. He never showed up. That was about 18 years ago. He must be doing a hell of a lot of laundry!

(Not) getting laid

I was reading a book tonight and one of the characters mentioned meeting a guy at a hotel to "get laid properly." *Sigh* How I miss getting laid. But I've promised myself to wait until I'm in a committed relationship.

Wait, deja vu. I just realized I've already written about this. But this time, it's because I'm really starting to develop strong feelings for Etch. He really is a great guy. Saturday night he came over to hang out. As soon as he came in the door, he started practically begging me to let him put my bookshelf together. It was so nice. He wanted to put the dresser together too, but I wouldn't let him. That's not at all what I invited him over for. Anyway, we watched a movie and there was some smooching afterwards, but he totally didn't try any 'funny business.' I don't know his reasoning, but that means a lot.

It was V's idea, and I've agreed, to wait until I've known him 6 months before I "go all the way" with him. It works out nicely because that will coincide with my birthday. That's not to say it's not on my mind frequently. There are just too many variables right now, and I don't want to regret it when I finally do it. I have to be sure that's it the (almost) right thing to do.